The East Terrace - For the rugby football enthusiast

Australian fan horrified to lose to England on Playstation 2 rugby game

All gone wrong
Australia crash to a digital England

Posted October, 2004

Gavin Peterson, a twenty-three year old Australian rugby fan, was distraught yesterday as the Australian national team he was responsible for on the EA Rugby 2004 Playstation 2 video game fell at home to the Auld Enemy.

Peterson could only bash buttons in horror as a digital rendering of Ben Cohen crashed over in injury time to top off a convincing win for England.

Peterson, who in the last three weeks has held head coach positions with Wales, France, New Zealand, Samoa, Ireland, Australia, Fiji, Tonga and Argentina, suffered his first defeat for 23 games in the 37-12 loss. A combination of poor tactical kicking, a call from his mother during a crucial passage of play and an over-indulgence in potato snacks all led to a below par performance from the digital Scottish team.

'It's been a great run of 23 wins,' said Peterson after the game. 'However, I knew each victory was one game closer to the one I was going to lose. Sadly, I lost in a manner that was highly disappointing and in a display far below the best I am capable of.'

Peterson was clearly agitated by his mother calling in the middle of the game and causing a twelve-minute delay in which he appeared to lose rhythm and focus. 'Although I didn't tell my mum I was in the middle of something, I was mumbling and grunting in a manner that implied I had other things to do. Did she get the hint? No, it was my little sister this and my little sister that. I hope she's happy now knowing stupid little Amy and her successful driving test cost our nation our digital dignity.'

Within two minutes of the call ending Australia had conceded 14 points and never recovered.

Unlike the real world version of the game, the repercussions from this defeat will only be felt in the Peterson household, mainly by his pet cat. Peterson has vowed to return fresh and focused for his World Cup campaign taking place next Tuesday evening. It will be his fourth appearance at the tournament in the past two months.